Just Waiting

Have you been asking, "Where's Julie?"

I am so ready for my life to slow down. I realize that it's in my hands and the decisions that I made over time are the reason I have such a full plate now. So I ask and pray what God wants me to drop. ~Silence~ That's what I get. I've gotten no definitive answer.

I called my mom and asked, "If God doesn't seem to be giving an answer, does that mean He's OK with me quitting things or should I wait."

My mom said, " I would say you need to stay where you are until He does give an answer."

I know she's right even though that's not the answer I really wanted to hear. I'm tired of having something "going on" every single day of the week. I'm tired of being gone, 4 out of 5 week nights.

So what would your advice have been?

This is where different "beliefs" come in. Is this issue one that if you don't believe a certain way you aren't saved? No. That makes it a non-essential issue in the matter of faith.

Some say, and I've heard this from many Christians and from some of my Christian College professors, that basically do what you want and go where you want and God will bless you where ever you are. I've witnessed MANY people live with this attitude and belief system, it's their lifestyle. Maybe that's what you believe.?. But I don't.

Then there is the lifestyle, where you try to always seek what God wants rather then what you want. Does He want us to move or stay? Does He want me to help or not? Does He want me to join this "good cause" or not? It also trickles down to small decisions, such as do I say this or keep my mouth shut? Do I go to this store or that one?

That can seem like "micro-managing" to some, and there are many times that I don't seek God, but think of the time and the hurt it could save. Is there anything wrong with seeking Him on all things? Is He capable to lead us to the "best" when we seek and ask? Of course He is!!! AND He can do so much more!!!(Phil. 1:9-11; Mt. 7:7-8; Eph. 3:20-21)

Many times where God leads us and what He leads us to do, is NOT the easy way! And many times it is NOT what we would choose for our self. It's in our weakness that His power is made perfect. (2 Cor. 12:9) Here are some examples from our own life.

Homeschooling, very tough to stick with it when you have struggling learners and bad attitudes to deal with. Think of all the free time I would have if my kids were at school. We have friends where their kids leave the house at 7:30am and don't get home until 5:00pm. That's like a full time job and I could sure do a LOT in that 8 1/2 hours, ie clean my house, catch up on laundry, get my Bible study done every day, blog more consistently, call friends more often, maybe get a job on the side to have some spending money, relax more with a good book, the list could go on and on!

Then think of the mood I could be in when they got home. I think I could be very loving, kind and attentive the 3-4 hours I see my kids each day and then they wouldn't see how imperfect I am. They wouldn't see my anger as much, or how grouchy I can get when I'm tired, how I lose my patience, etc., etc. I would also have someone else to "blame" when my child was struggling.

Staying where we were at. In the past we have had very hard, tough times at churches we've ministered at. Betrayal, tearing down, attacks just not on yourself but family members which are much harder to deal with, being away from family and many other things that if we "left" we wouldn't have to bear it. If we left places every time someone hurt us, or we didn't like what they were doing, we sure wouldn't be anywhere for very long. Yet, I see so many Christians who do just that..

Leaving where we were at. There have been a few times in our life where God has moved us on. Every time it was a tough thing. Even though there are those who make things hard, there are always those whom we've come to really love and care for. Every time it has moved us further from family. We move into an "unknown" area, with no friends, and we step out of what was comfortable for us.

As we look back, we now can see what God was doing through the whole thing. Many lessons were learned, and we were directed in areas He wanted us to go. Sometimes it was just a curve and other times it was a 180. We were tested and refined with fire. But being on the other side of the obedience, the blessings have been "out of this world"! I hate to think of all we would have missed out on if we had done what we wanted to do and just expected God to bless it, rather than submitting in obedience and doing what God wanted us to do, which IS always the BEST!

So now I'm just waiting. I don't want to get out of His plan for me because I'm sure there are lessons for me to learn and blessings for me to receive.

This went a totally different direction then I thought it would when I first started typing, I guess God knows I'll probably need to remind myself of this some day. :o)